Cleo Li was born healthy. Then, one night when she was just three months old, she stopped breathing. CPR brought her back to life, but Cleo had suffered a massive brain injury due to lack of oxygen.

Just like that, the Li family had a daughter with special needs, and their world was turned upside down.

Watch this Learning for Life as the Li family gives us a look at what it's like to have a child with special needs - whether that child is born with special needs or, like Cleo, suffers a traumatic event to her body. They talk about the emotional ups and downs as well as the challenges of finding information and support and the amazing difference early intervention makes for a child and a family.

This is the third segment in a month-long series Learning for Life - and Birth to Thrive Online (Thrive's daily blog) - is doing on children with special needs. Next week, we look at Autism - what it is, how it's diagnosed and the signs parents should look for. We also explore the issue of whether there are enough resources available to support the increasing numbers of children being diagnosed with an Autism Spectrum Disorder and their families.

Learning for Life airs every Wednesday on KING 5 Morning News on KONG 6/16 TV between 8:15 and 8:30 a.m.

Learn more and watch past Learning for Life series and specials here.

Each month the economic argument for quality child care, preschool and pre-kindergarten seems to grow stronger and this week another writer linked investments in early learning with a stronger economic future.

In the Huffington Post piece, Pat Earley highlights many of the benefits of spending money on early learning, but she also explains that investments don’t always follow.

The United States currently faces serious education and budgetary problems. There is a growing body of work that shows that high-quality early childhood development and education is a powerful way to help address these problems and lay a foundation for human and economic growth.

…

Although most policy makers agree on the importance of early childhood education, budgetary constraints, as well as an inability to view these programs as fiscally sound investments in tomorrow's future workforce, continue to stand in the way of redirecting funds toward the early years. – “Teach Your Children Well,” Huffington Post, 7/21/10.

The story also argues that early education isn’t only about teachers, classrooms and curriculums. It needs programs that “integrate the family into the solution.”

In a related development, the College Board reports today that the U.S. has fallen to 12th in the proportion of adults ages 25 to 34 who hold postsecondary credentials.

"The growing education deficit is no less a threat to our nation's long-term well-being than the current fiscal crisis. It requires the same kind of attention and action at the highest levels of our education institutions and national and state governments," Gaston Caperton said in a statement. "To improve our college completion rates, we must think 'P–16' and improve education from preschool through higher education."

Some would say there is a connection.

Sugar. In some form or another, it's in almost everything we eat. And most of us can't get enough of it.
 
But, for many young children, those regular handfuls of animal cookies, after-dinner scoops of ice cream and sippy-cups full of juice are starting to add up. Diets full of sugar lead to a rollercoaster of wide of energy and moods; contribute to weight gain; and contribute to insulin resistance and Type 2 diabetes, which is affecting more and more children.
 
Wach as we talk with Cynthia Lair, local nutrition educator and author of Feeding the Whole Family and the online cooking show www.cookusinterruptus.com, about sugar and what all parents can do to lessen the amount of sugar in their children's diets ... starting in infancy.

A new study suggests there are three types of families, cohesive, enmeshed and disengaged, and those last two types can create specific problems for kids when they start school.

Disengaged families may behave in ways found in the depressing movie “Ordinary People,” while enmeshed families may resemble the famous Barones from the popular sitcom “Everybody Loves Raymond,” according to a story on the study in Medical News Today.  

Neither parenting style is good.

"This study shows that cold and controlling family environments are linked to a growing cascade of difficulties for children in their first three years of school, from aggressive and disruptive behavior to depression and alienation," (Melissa) Sturge-Apple (lead researcher and an assistant professor of psychology at the University of Rochester) explains. "The study also finds that children from families marked by high levels of conflict and intrusive parenting increasingly struggle with anxiety and social withdrawal as they navigate their early school years." – Medical News Today, 7/18/10.

While it may seem obvious Mary Tyler Moore’s character as a mom in “Ordinary People”and Ray Romano as a dad are not great role models, researchers suggested their parenting styles can lead to specific challenges for kids early in elementary school. (Check out the story for details.)

If you are looking for a better role model, the healthy cohesive family is reflected in the Huckstables from “The Cosby Show,” according to the article.

Thanks to Daddytypes for highlighting this research.

You can read this top daddy blog’s hilarious Friday Freakout for amusing takes on medical news for families.

New Early Learning Website: If you get a moment, check out the U.S. Department of Education’s Early Learning Initiative website.

My brother taught me my most valuable parenting lesson. You can buy your kid the latest educational toy, enroll her in Mandarin and sign her up for soccer, tee-ball and yoga, but what she really needs is your time.

This sounds easier than it is. Kids often live in the moment, while parents often live in many moments - work, family and the virtual worlds of their smart phones. Giving your kids time means ignoring your Blackberry, the growing pile of bills on your desk and the latest scratch on the minivan.

This lesson occurred to me as I checked out Ellen Galinsky’s new book, “Mind in the Making: The Seven Essential Skills Every Child Needs.” Galinsky’s book is not another parenting flavor of the month to hit bookstores. Instead, over the last eight years the veteran researcher gathered the findings and thinking of 70 leading researchers to figure out what kids really need in the modern world.

She came away with seven essential life skills: focus and self control; perspective taking; communicating; making connections; critical thinking; taking on challenges and pursuing ongoing learning. And all of these skills require a key element: your time.

For example, to develop perspective taking, you can ask your children to think about perspectives of characters in books you read to them, Galinsky says. Why did they act that way? What were they thinking? This is more involved than cracking a book after a long day at work.  It requires mom and dad to engage the book the same way their kids do.

Galinsky’s ideas are resonating around the country. One New York Times review said: “It may well be the next iconic parenting manual, up there with Spock and Leach and Brazelton…”

“Mind in the Making” is not simply a book full of excellent parenting lessons, though, it’s a campaign.  Galinsky is traveling around the country conducting a conversation about early learning, education and family-work balance. She also is sharing key research from her book in videos.  (Check out the website for links.)

My brother is gone now, taken far too early by cancer. But, I think his parenting ideas are still around, including in the pages of Galinsky’s new book.

Check it out.

On Sunday, we will celebrate dads everywhere. Thanks to Marvin Charles, more men are learning to be the involved, nurturing and loving dads their children need and want. 
 
Charles is co-founder of the nonprofit D.A.D.S. - Divine Alternative for Dads Services. For more than a decade, D.A.D.S. has provided hope, services and supports to dads of all ages who may be coming out of prison, battling substance abuse or living on the streets and wanting to reconnect with their children.

Watch this week's Learning for Life as we talk with Charles about the D.A.D.S. program, what happened in his own life that led him to create D.A.D.S. and how he's a completely different father with his youngest daughter. We'll also talk with current D.A.D.S. client Dewayne Sullivan.

Learning for Life airs every Wednesday on KING 5 Morning News on KONG 6/16 TV between 8:15 and 8:30 a.m.

Learn more and watch past Learning for Life series and specials here.

News is quieting down as the holiday season gets underway, but there are a couple of reports worth noting today about childhood obesity, including one that shows Head Start is making impressive progress in the fight against this growing health problem.

In a Temple University-led study, researchers found three quarters of 1,583 Head Start programs had adult-led physical activity for at least 30 minutes a day and more than half, 56 percent, instituted 60 minutes of unstructured activity in addition to that half hour, according to a research summary.

Most of the Head Start programs, 70 percent also reported serving non-fat or one-percent milk and nearly all served vegetables and fruit at some point in the day - it didn’t count French fries or 100-percent fruit juice, researchers said.

This is important because the 44-year-old program often serves as a model for other pre-kindergarten and preschool programs, researchers added.

“Early childhood education and childcare programs throughout the nation have traditionally looked to the Head Start regulations to set their own standards,” Robert Whitaker, lead author of the study and a professor of pediatrics and public health at the Center for Obesity Research and Education, said in the summary.

In related news, researchers uncovered some severely obese children gained excessive weight because they lacked key DNA elements, the Associated Press reports via MSNBC.com.

Lisa Belkin tackled an emerging trend yesterday that could reshape or at least revise parenting in this country in a New York Times Magazine column entitled “The End of Over-Parenting?”

But whatever you call it, and however it began, its days may be numbered. It seems as though the newest wave of mothers is saying no to prenatal Beethoven appreciation classes, homework tutors in kindergarten, or moving to a town near their child’s college campus so the darling can more easily have home-cooked meals. (O.K., O.K., many were already saying no, but now they’re doing so without the feeling that a good parent would say yes.)  -- New York Times Magazine, 5/31/09.

Why should early learning folks care about the potential demise of “alpha parenting?” Think about drop-off time at any child care center. You will surely remember interactions that effect mom, dad, teacher and child: intensive questioning about a toddler’s latest breakthrough, how the classroom is run or whether Susie ate her special broccoli. These questions can strain or strengthen one of a parent’s most important relationships. And the little sponge you are dropping off is taking in all of this behavior.

In the last couple of years I noticed a backlash to helicopter parenting – parents who hover over their children’s lives and development – as part of a broader dynamic. I think relaxed parenting fits with the resurgence of the power of play in school and at home, the nature-deficit movement and even happy hour playdates. It all suggests we are crossing to a less stressed-out, and dare I say healthier, style of parenting.

As a former dad blogger, I have to add that dads could be a force behind this trend. I see stressed out dads at the playground and preschool, but not that many. Perhaps it is because many of us are new to this co-parenting thing. As we take on bigger roles at home, dads may give relaxed parenting a boost.
Belkin, though, raises an important point about taking this trend too far. Relaxed parenting could simply be the latest in a long line of parenting trends, where moms and dads try to be the most nonchalant parent, the New York Times blogger writes.

I am hoping it is a sign we learned from the helicopter parenting trend that mom, dad and their kids can benefit by downshifting, maybe not to neutral but to third or second gear.

One of the most dramatic effects of the recession is that men are losing jobs at a much faster rate than women, and that shift is likely having a profound effect on child care.

One year into this relentless economic contraction, men accounted for three out of four jobs lost, according to an analysis by Heather Boushey, senior economist at the Center for American Progress. That means dads received a lot more pink slips than moms.

What does this mean for child care?

The Wall Street Journal was the latest to weigh in with a story this week Extreme Child-Care Maneuvers. (It’s good read.)

As they navigate shifting economic territory, parents are getting creative, and one paragraph resonated with me.

Forced by the recession to cut costs while snapping up every opportunity to work, husbands and wives are swapping roles and bending work schedules at levels never seen before. Layoff victims are squeezing in freelance work amid family duties. – WSJ, 5/20/09.

We are definitely doing this dance at my house. This month I am working nearly full time, while also a part-time stay-at-home dad. We hired a great nanny to cover about half the child care duties.

With work scarce, families are building similar arrangements around the country, and the trend could create some difficulties.

Kids are getting more time with their parents, but both parents may be stressed out.

Dads are more involved in childrearing, but working moms may be stretched even thinner.

These changes should spark a lot of thoughtful discussions and research in the coming years, particularly if the economy recovers as slowly as economists are predicting.

One positive impact, though, is already emerging.

 “When men do go through short bouts of unemployment and end up spending more time with their family they are more likely to spend more time with their family when they go back,” said Stephanie Coontz at the Council on Contemporary Families.

Any thoughts?

Arguing Early Education:

• 4 good reasons why ECE (Early Childhood Education) is not just important, but essential – ChildCareExchange
• Slow the Preschool Bandwagon – The Washington Post, 5/15/09.
  “For all its surface appeal, universal preschool is an unwise use of tax dollars.”  

Plus:

• Providing Equal Access to Full-Day Kindergarten, – The Washington Post, 5/14/09.

Parenting News

• Is Laziness the Secret of Successful Parenting? – Wall Street Journal, 5/11/09.
• Pregnant, newborn most at risk of flu – UPI, 5/14/09.
• Chicago is first U.S. city to ban BPA baby bottles – Associated Press, via MSNBC.com

Research:

• Almost 1 in 5 WA kids don't get enough to eat – No Kidding! Children’s Alliance blog, 5/13/09.
• Mirror Neurons Key to Social Skills: Researchers Explore Differences in Children with ASDs, Winter 2009 – CHDD Outlook, News from the Center on Human Development and Disability at the University of Washington Health Sciences Center, Winter 2009.

(Thanks to the Foundation for Early Learning, Hechinger Institute’s EarlyStories and Pre-K Now for helping find these stories.)